Lost
by naniek
Summary: Yea! I am still alive and here are three chaps just for you. I'm sorry for the long delay. The aftermath of Spike's suicidal mission and the effects for Faye.ctions. Story now continued.
1. Chapter 1

Hey, naniek here and I have actually written something out instead of just thinking about it! Yeah me! I have been reviewing others' stories at this site for years, so I guess it was time...Anyway heard this song and thought it would be perfect to reflect Faye's feelings at the end of the series. I felt the need to contribute to one of the very first animes I ever watched, and I always wanted Faye and Spike together... Anywayz read and review please-this may or may not be a one shot.

**Disclaimer: ** If I owned Cowboy Bebop there would have been some kind of epilogue and no death of Spike. The song is "Lost" and belongs to Little Big Town. This song was written by one of the members whose husband died, so I mean no disrespect using it and fully understand her feelings in this song.

**"Lost"**

The door opened an hour before closing, and the bartender glanced up from wiping out a glass shock and awe registering on his face at the beauty that had just walked in. Not many people as young as her ever came into his bar as they thought it was outdated, and definitely not women who were as striking and statuesque as a model. She had purple hair, green eyes, creamy skin and a thin, voluptuous body. She had a yellow headband on, yellow hotpants, white boots, and a man's wrinkled yellow dress shirt.

She strolled in and plopped onto a barstool. The bartender went over to her and asked, " What can I get ya?"

"Double shot of scotch on the rocks," she answered keeping her head down.

He brought her the drink and whistled between his teeth at how haggard her face looked up close. She had dark circles under her eyes, bloodshot eyes obviously from crying, and she had tear tracks down both cheeks. He felt fatherly affection towards her, and wondered what could have happened to the poor girl.

He felt compelled to ask, "Are you alright?"

She nodded at first then shook her head and gave a hollow, broken laugh.

He left it at that sensing that she did not want to talk about it, and walked away to serve another customer.

Faye took a sip of her drink as she looked around. The place was barely shy of being a dump. But the fact that it was dark, gloomy, and pretty silent except for the radio set on an oldies station suited her mood perfectly. She had left the Bebop shortly after Spike had left, needing to get away from the place that seemed to be saturated with his presence, which was hours ago now. She had been aimlessly wandering the streets of Mars til she came upon this place and decided to enter.

She finished her drink, and the bartender poured her another. She started actually listening to the radio, recognizing some of the songs when a song from 2005 came on.

_I don't know who I am_

_Staring at the million broken pieces here_

_I don't know where I stand_

_While I'm still the world goes round so free, so cavalier_

_And aimlessly I wander like a drifter on a narrow winding road_

_I've got plenty of direction _

_But I don't know where to go_

Tears started pouring down her face, as she realized how true that was. She remembered her past but it didn't do any good since everything she had known was destroyed. For three years she wandered the galaxy, until she found a place to call home and people to claim as family. Now that was all destroyed by one who couldn't ever let go and escape his place.

_I'm so lost without you_

_I'm so lost without you_

_Baby I'm so lost without you_

_That I can't find myself_

Sobs started to rack her body. She cried for her past, her families of long ago and the more recent dysfunctional one, the arguements, the fond nicknames, for him. The bartender looked over at her with concern and again asked if she was all right. She couldn't answer.

_I know it don't seem right_

_This canyon of lonely lying in my bed_

_Lord how I've cried_

_A waterfall of tears til my eyes turn red_

_And ever since you left me_

_It's been like a bullet through my heart_

_And I know I should move on_

_But I don't know where to start_

She started crying even harder. Heart, gut wrenching sobs escaped her throat. She remembered another drunken night lying in his arms. The one and only time she ever felt complete. She remembers feeling safe, finally home, at peace, a sense of belonging, and loved. Then came morning and it was like nothing had happenned. They went back to arguing as usual and never mentioned it again. A few days later he went on his stupid suicide mission.

_I'm so lost without you_

_I'm so lost without you_

_Baby I'm so lost without you_

_That I can't find myself_

She really felt lost, so she let herself become angry and screamed, "That stupid Lunk-head!!"

_And ever since you left me_

_It's been like a bullet through my heart_

_And I know I should move on_

_But I don't know where to start_

The bartender was startled at the first words she had spoken, err screamed since she ordered her drink. He pushed a glass of water toward her and held out a handkerchief. After glowering at him for a second, Faye accepted both with a small smile.

_I'm so lost without you_

_I'm so lost without you_

_Baby I'm so lost without you_

_That I can't find myself_

_I'm so lost without you_

_I'm so lost _

_Baby I'm so lost without you_

_That I can't find myself_

Faye wiped her face and blew her nose and downed the water. She decided to go back to the only family she had left. With her eyes still swimming with unshed tears, she felt compelled to go offer some meagre comfort to her father figure on the Bebop who had essentially lost a son today.

As she walked out of the bar she was feeling a little better, a little less lost, and she knew life would go on some how, some way.

See ya, space cowgirl!!

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Okay tell me what ya think! I know it is nowhere near the best, but I don't think it's too horrible. I do have ideas on how to continue this, but it can also stand by itself.

Jaa ne!!


	2. Chapter 2

Hey People!!! I am back! Two great reviewers wanted me to continue, so here is the next chappy. Sorry if it took awhile. I have to be in the right mood and not delirously tired in order to want to write and to write something decent. I have finally figured out how to enable the anonymous review thingy( I honestly thought I had-sorry). Music inspires me so I will be using Little Big Town's "Stay". I can't believe two of their songs go so well with what I want to write, but they are a good group anyway. Okay be nice first lemon attempt here!

**Rikku-apple-**Thanks a bunch and here you go!

**LonelyPakman-** It is so sweet you made an account just to review to my little chap( I never had one until I posted this either-course it made me wait three days to post it). This site omits all internet addresses so you have to write it out like this- n underscore aniek04 at yahoo. There you have mine so ask away! Why are you lonely anyway?:)

**Disclaimer:** Alas, I do not own, if I did I would actually have money! ha-ha!

**Lemon warning!!!!!!!!! **Do not proceed if you are a kid!( even though I was reading romance novels at 10- he he-I just wanted to know and curiousity only ever killed the cat and the stupid people in horror movies!) Oh, I am a hopeless/hopeful romantic btw!

**Stay**

Silence. That's what greeted Faye as she walked onto the Bebop. Curious and concerned she started looking for Jet, and found him staring at his bonsai trees, clippers in hand. She cleared her throat.

He looked up, a bit surprised, "So you're back. Dinner's on the stove." Then he turned his attention back to the trees.

Faye, sensing he wanted to be alone, left. Her stomach growled so she went to the kitchen to see what was for dinner. She gave a half-smile as she filled her plate with Jet's specialty bell peppers and beef minus beef. She sat down and started shoveling the food into her mouth thinking of other times sitting here eating the same thing, just with other company.

At that thought, Faye lost her appetite and felt the urge to finish the drinking she had started earlier. She got up and pushed her chair in front of the fridge in order to reach the cabinets above. After pushing aside some unappetizing foodstuffs, she found it. The only bottle of Cuervo left unopened from that night. She quickly hopped down, grabbed a shot glass, bypassed the couch( too many memories), and went to her room. She sat on her bed and downed three shots straight. Finally feeling less tense, she leaned back and laid back on her propped up pillows.

_How can I bare _

_to wake up and you're not there?_

_What will I do_

_when I turn and reach for you?_

_I lay my tears on the windowsill_

_I 'll only cry til I get over you_

_But how long will it take me?_

_Won't you save me_

_And Stay_

_Just a little bit longer_

_Til I'm a little bit stronger_

_To take all this_

_And Stay_

_Just a little more time _

_Til I can find a way_

_Please Stay_

After staring at the wall for a few minutes thinking about what had happened two days ago, Faye lit a cigarette, ignored the glass, and started drinking staight from the bottle. As she started fiddling with the label, her mind recalled what had happenned to the other two identical ones.

_**Flashback (about a month/less before):**_

Faye walked back onto the Bebop in high spirits. She had actually won some money at the races, and was carrying a heavy looking brown paper sack. She went into the living room to find the lunkhead sprawled out on the couch, as usual, watching the t.v.

"Hello lunkhead," Faye said cheerfully, "where's the kid and Jet?"

Spike looked well, more like glowered at her for interrupting his solitude and answered, "Jet took the kid with him to look for some parts to repair my ship and the bebop. They won't be back until sometime tomorrow. What are you so happy about and what's in the bag?"

"Well, I won at the races and decided to celebrate," Faye answered and pulled out three fifths of Jose Cuervo.

Spike's eyes widened and Faye smirked, "If you're nice I might share."

Spike rolled his eyes, "Whatever Faye." But he sat up so she could sit down on the couch as well.

"Go get some shot glasses while I get the salt and limes."

"Why? Can't drink straight from the bottle Romani?"

"But that way's no fun. This way we can play a game doing shots and it will be fun," Faye whined.

"Whatever," Spike groaned, but got up anyway and got the glasses while Faye got the rest.

"So what game are we playing Faye?"

"Woolongs!"

"Huh?"

"Jeez Spike! Don't tell me you've never played before!"

He glared at her and shrugged his shoulders, "Just tell me how to."

"Okay. Jeez, all you have to do is try to flip a woolong in to the shot glass. If you make it the other person takes a shot, if you miss you take it, and you have to move back a little each time to make it harder." (quaters anyone:))

"Ladies first."

"Wimp!" Faye filled two of the glasses to the brim, and took out a woolong and flipped it into the empty glass.

Faye smirked as Spike licked salt off his hand, downed the shot, and shoved a lime wedge in his mouth. Her smirk left as Spike then flipped the woolong into the glass and smirked at her. She took the shot as well.

They repeated this until the challenge in their eyes became dull as they started on the second bottle. Then they both leaned back on the couch passing the bottle back and forth.

Spike took out a cigarette, lit it, and lazily blew rings into the air.

"Hey give me one!"

"Get your own Faye."

"I shared my liquor with you, the least you could do is give me one," Faye whiningly slurred.

"No."

"Why you green-haired idiot!"

Spike was surprised when she lunged at him, knocking him over sprawled on the couch. She started wrestling with him trying to take the cigarette from his mouth, but he swallowed it whole out of spite. Faye was surprised then she saw red and tried to clobber him with the empty bottle. He caught her wrist and twisted his body so she was lying beneath him.

Faye started sputtering curses at him. He heard something like "idiotic lunkhead, stupid male gorilla, and fuzzy haired jackass."

"God woman is there no way to shut you up?!"

Faye smiled to herself at the memory which turned to a wry smirk as she recalled what happenned next. Both of them blamed the Cuervo the next morning.

_Will I ever smile again _

_When losing love takes my best friend_

_To wonder where_

_To wonder how_

_Wonder what you're doing_

_One more night just before you break me_

_Hold me safely_

Spike leaned forward and pressed his lips against hers. She gasped and he took advantage of the opportunity and thrust his tongue into her mouth.

Spike pulled away smirking, "So there _is_ a way to shut you up."

Faye glowered up at him and as she was raising her hand to slap him, his lips once again claimed hers. Their tongues dueled incessantly. Each gave as good as they got while pushing thoughts of "we really shouldn't be doing this" out of their minds.

When air became necessary, Spike broke the kiss and started placing nibbiling kisses along Faye's jawline. She leaned her head back giving him better access to her neck, and he obliged. While kissing the column of her throat, his hands were moving all over her body. While one hand rubbed patterns along her thigh, the other cupped her breast and teased her nipple through the yellow fabric.

Faye's hands were busy as well. She had managed to get spike to stop moving his hands so that she could push off his jacket. She had unbuttoned his shirt and was rubbing her hands along every ridge of muscle he had. When she flicked his nipple, he did the same to her.

When Faye brushed a hand over the front of his pants, Spike sat up. "What?"

He pulled her up and said, "Bedroom."

The door was still closing as they started shedding each other's clothes, Spike walking forward the whole time making Faye step back until the back of her legs hit his bed. She layed down with Spike covering her and she gasped as she felt every inch of his body pressed against her own. They started kissing again, but neither could keep their hands still. His hands swept over every inch of her body as her hands did with his body.

Spike broke the kiss, and started a trail down her throat to her breast. As his lips and tongue scorched a path to one of her aching peaks, his hand was massaging a tweaking the other. When he reached her nipple, he began a combination of nibbling and suckling that caused such a frenzy within her that nearly pushed her over the edge. When he was done ravishing that one he turned to the other and paid the same amount of homage to it.

When Spike was satisfied that he had paid enough attention to both of Faye's glorious mounds, his mouth startied moving down her flat stomach. After dipping his tongue into her belly button a couple of times, he continued going south. At the sight of her curls he groaned. He just had to have a taste.

As soon as Faye felt him licking her womanhood, she bucked so hard that Spike had to hold her down at the waist so that neither would fall off the bed. He chuckled against her, but continued to hold her down because he would not be deterred from his objective. When she came he lapped her up as she screamed his name.

Spike blazed a trail up the limp Faye until he reached her mouth and started kissing her again. She wrapped her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist. As he entered her their eyes locked and neither looked away as they began the age old motion. The closer the got the harder Spike thrust. Both cried the other's name as they reached their peaks at the same time. Spike spilled his seed into Faye and collapsed on her with his head on her shoulder. Faye sofltly stroked the sweat-slicked skin of his back as they fell asleep.

_And Stay_

_Please won't you stay with me_

_Just a little bit longer_

_Til I'm a little bit stronger_

_To take all this_

_And Stay_

_Just a little more time_

_Til I can find a way_

_Please Stay_

The next morning they both woke up with hangovers. They both got dressed and agreed to never speak of the "incident" again. Nether one crossed the lines of their platonic relationship again until the day he left and decided to tell her about his past and gave her further insight into the mind of Spike Spiegal.

_So I'll be a big girl and close my eyes_

_As you walk away don't say goodbye_

_God save me_

_Please won't you _

_Stay_

As Faye takes another swig, she remembers how complete she felt lying in his arms. She had finally felt whole. It no longer mattered that she couldn't remember who she had once been. At that moment she felt like she was truly herself. She had comfort, affection, and love? At that thought she took another swig, then set the bottle aside and drifted to sleep thinking of fuzzy green hair.

_Please won't you_

_Stay with me _

_Just a little bit longer_

_Til I'm a little bit stronger_

_To take all this_

_Just a little more time_

_Til I can find a way_

_Won't you stay_

_Just a little bit longer_

_Stay_

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Whew! Thank gah that's done! It took a while to actually finish and I am so tired I can barely keep my eyes open. Sorry for any run-on sentences and misspellings. I am way too tired as it is now 1:07am. So what do ya think? Better than the first, since the story was written and then I added the song into it, instead of writing the story around the song. By the way, I write off the cuff after getting a general idea, so what you read is the rough draft. Now I shall go to sleep as I have to be at work later.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey Everbody!!** Yes, I am still alive. I have just been really busy with work, and have been in mourning over not getting my way in Harry Potter, especially when I know I am right and it would have happened my way in the real world. I mean come on you spend the seven years with only one person constantly by your side, who everything they do is for you( whether for protection or help), who you only fight over things that matter( firebolt not withstanding), who when they are hurt makes you feel so helpless and useless and you just can't think, who helps you in romantic endeavors just to make you happy, who is the first person you always try to protect usually by putting yourself in harm's way first, who was the first one to cry over you, who never cared what anyone else thought, who was the first one to show you affection, and you only think of them as a sibling c'mon in the real world that's your soulmate, the one you love through eternity. You can't have a lasting relationship with someone you fight over everything with, and they make you slap them upside the head friends yes, but never anything more-believe me I had a friend like that and I could never think of him romantically because he was such an idiot all the time

Okay now that I have finally let that out, and think I still have to get DH from the apartment's office- I read on a forum what happened because I like the ending spoiled and I have to say I might not read it for years-not until I am over my disappointment I still have not read HBP-ha ha, and I got it the day it came out( I have the bad habit of reading the ending and if I don't like it- especially if it doesn't go my way I don't read it-though I did get through Little Women when I was ten, but I might have been less stubborn then. Harry and Hermione live forever in my own little world, as do Ginny and Draco, Ron and Luna, Spike and Faye, Laurie and Jo, Lira and Will( the golden compass, subtle knife, amber spyglass), Djukan and Aislynn( the mystic quest), Shin and Kumiko, Kyo and Yuya, Mugen and Fuu, Sanosuke and Megumi, Aoshi and Misao, Rogue and Wolverine, Buffy and Spike, Mikagami and Fuuko, Kurama and Botan, and a bunch of others I can't remember names or titles of books I've read too many. At least I can still hope for the couples meant to be on all on-going shows.

Anyway, thanks to

**Scar of the Black Right Hand- **thanks for the good luck wishes. Hope you enjoy!

**Rookie- **thanks and I hug you for being so sweet!

**Stacy Loves Kyo-Kun-** Aww thanks and here's the update more to come I promise, and other ones from me though probably oneshots. Sorry this is a few days late, I just have not been in the mood to write though I did my intro and the song last Wednesday like I said I would.

**Captain Rikku Apple-** Sorry, about the really late update. Thanks for reviewing again.

**Disclaimer:** I will own only if I marry the creator and he dies, and he's just not cute enough for me, though I do have a thing for the Japanese and Korean men have you seen the Korean group GOD- I mean c'mon. XD - The song is "A Great Disguise" by Martina McBride, and yes another country song, but since the sound device on my computer died mysteriously I can't listen to my other thousand songs I have on it but not a CD of, oh well. And when you listen to a Christian radio station while the music is great and inspiring, not so great to fit in fics like this, though like two weeks ago I got to be on the night show total axxess by doing my hot list-yea!! it was fun.

**A Great Disguise**

Consciousness returned slowly to Faye. As she blinked her eyes open, she shut them just as quickly and groaned. The noontime sun streamed in through her window, hitting her directly in the eyes making the headache and subsequent hangover much worse. Faye put her hands over her face as she slowly sat up trying to fight the building nausea. It really did not help as she shakily stood then darted to the bathroom.

When she finished emptying the contents of her stomach, she went to the sink to brush her teeth and looked into the mirror, and gasped. The face looking back at her looked half-dead. She was white as a ghost, had tearstains running down both cheeks, smeared mascara everywhere, bloodshot eyes that were puffy, bloodless lips, and her hair looked lank and dull.

"Screw this," murmmered Faye, "Just because that lunkhead decided to go out and get himself killed, doesn't mean that I have to look and feel like shit forever and cry over him every damn day!"

Faye then turned on the knobs to the shower and hopped in, resolutely scrubbing every inch until she was squeaky clean. Faye hopped out, dried off, did her hair, put on her makeup, and donned her regular outfit once again. She walked out of the bathroom feeling the best she had in weeks. She had her head up, shoulders back, and the confidence in herself was back as she sauntered down the hallway looking for Jet. She wanted to get off the ship for a while, and if she could get a small bounty for extra cash, why not?

_People talking, think I'm alright_

_Think I'm doing fine_

_Goin' through the motions of my life_

_Go to work now every mornin'_

_Yeah I play the part_

_And hide away the contents of my solemn heart_

_But when the sun goes down _

_And the moon is high_

_I can't control the flood of all these tears inside_

_And if they only knew_

_They'd be so surprised_

_I'm just a good pretender in a great disguise_

"Hey Jet, where are you?"

Jet poked his head out from his bonsai room and asked, "What do you want?"

"I want to get off the ship for a while, and thought I could make it worthwhile to bring in some small fry and get some woolongs for it."

Jet looked at her closely, "Are you sure you are up to that Faye?"

Faye glared at him, "Don't you dare patronize me! I am FINE! Just find me a damn bounty!" She added, "Please Jet, just do it, and send me the stats through my comm. I'll be out taking a walk."

With that Faye walked out the hanger, and once outside took in a deep breath of the fresh air. She strolled down the street oblivious to the hungry stares she was getting from males and some females as well. Her comm beeped and she read the stats to her new prey. He was only 5'4 with brown hair, pretty ugly, and was wanted for various petty thefts. He was just perfect for Faye, something easy.

**3 hours later**

Faye returned to the bebop sweaty, bleeding, dirty, and tired. She had found the bounty easily enough, but he decided to run like a coward so she had to give chase. When she finally cornered him in an alleyway, she thought he would give up since she had her glock pointed towards him and he seemed weaponless. But no, as she was cuffing him he pulled out a switchblade with his free hand and slashed her arm, at which point Faye was pissed and brought her glock down on the back of his head. She had gotten her money though, as he was still alive.

_Keep 'em guessing, keep 'em laughin'_

_Build that wall up high_

_As long as they don't see the other side _

_You've really done it_

_Done a number, a number on my soul_

_But I'll be damned if I'll ever let you know_

Faye went straight to the bathroom, thankfully Jet hadn't seen her. She got the gauze and alcohol and proceeded to rinse off the blood from the cut. The smell of blood started making her feel lightheaded, but she ignored it and started pouring the alcohol over the gash. That's when she lost it and for the second time that day found herself emptying the contents of her stomach.

"That's weird. The smell of blood and alcohol has never affected me like that before. It should have before considering all the times and the exstensiveness that fuzzball always got himself injured," thought Faye.

_But when the sun goes down_

_And the moon is high_

_There's no way to hide the truth from me, myself, and I _

_Yeah, I wear it well_

_Though it ain't my size_

_I'm just a good pretender in a great disguise_

"Maybe I am just getting my period," thought Faye. She had heard that some women become sick like that, though she had never been one of them. As Faye considered that possibility, she quickly dismissed it as she should have had it a week ago, but she hadn't which she at the time shrugged it off due to emotional distress. Then a whole new and unconsidered possibility came to mind, which sent her to the nearest store.

She was back in less than five minutes, and hurried into the bathroom feeling like she had just smuggled illegal drugs on board. After reading the instructions on the back of the box, she sat down on the toilet and pricked her finger filling the little square on the white stick with blood and waited for five minutes for the results. At exactly five minutes, the stick printed out the word positive 4 weeks, and underneath that, twins sex 1 male 1 female.( hey just figured that at that point in the future we'd have something more sophisticated than peeing on a stick that could be wrong, so you still have to go the doctor.) Faye read the results in complete shock. Her mouth gaped open, while her breathing stopped for a minute. Then she was crying and gasping for air.

_I'm not one to show emotion_

_Like some fools I see_

_I won't wear my heart out on my sleeve_

_I don't miss you _

_Not for a moment_

_I'm gonna be okay_

_Words of wisdom spoken_

_By the light of day_

Her mind couldn't process it. "No way. Not just from one night. Not now that he's gone." She just sat down on the floor and cuddled her knees to her chest.

Jet heard noises coming from the bathroom, so he decided to check and make sure that Faye was alright. He was not too convinced that what he saw earlier was not just an act. He looked in and saw Faye huddled on the floor crying holding on to something.

"Faye what's wrong? Did something go wrong with the bounty?"

Faye shook her head.

"Is it Spike?"

At that Faye cried even harder, and attempted to nod. Jet was horrified at all this emotion, so he sat down beside her and put his hand on her shoulder.

He said, "I miss Spike too, but crying all the time is not healthy. Do you want to talk about it?"

In response, Faye handed him the piece of paper she had been holding. Jet took it and after reading it did a spectacular impression of a fish.

"Is it...?"

Faye nodded.

"I'm so sorry Faye, but we'll get through this somehow." With that Jet put his arm around her and let her cry herself to sleep. Then he picked her up and put her in her bed.

_But when the sun goes down_

_And the moon is high_

_Your memory pulls me under like a strong riptide_

_I'm still in love with you_

_It's all smoke and lights_

_I'm just a good pretender in a great disguise_

_I'm just a good pretender in a great disguise_

As he walked away from her door, he muttered, "That stupid green-haired idiot."

At that moment in a sterile room, a pair of mismatched hues opened

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And I do believe, that could be considered a cliff-hanger, but not really. Anywayz, let me know what you think- like it or not. If I ever become less lazy and decide to write more story fics the twins will be a recurring ( and i do believe that is misspelled)theme. Thanks to those who reviewed and even those who didn't cuz I know I don't review all the time either. And yes you can disagree with me on my rants I went on before the disclaimer.


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey Everybody!** Surprise I am still alive- my muse just decided to leave me for a while. I really wanted to do a chap for when Spike wakes up but I might have to just summarize it in the chap after this one. I couldn't find the right song about waking up and the past comes back- I know there probably is one on my computer, but since it says no sound device found I can't search the few thous. songs I have downloaded. (I posted the rest of my rant at the bottom.) _Oh I started this in November and then lost my muse and I ended up working at Target for like two months and I ended up hating it, so I quit Jan. 27. I am still trying to find a job, but no call backs yet. Oh, I became an aunt once again on Feb. 13. Welcome Caleb Dean. He's soo cute. This will be posted as soon as I get a job and pay my internet/cable bill._

**Disclaimer:** If I owned it there would be no need to look for another job. The song is "In My Arms" by Plum. She's a Christian artist and has a hauntingly beautiful voice. One you hear and can never forget like Hyde the Japanese singer ( in case you don't know-if you watch cartoon network he sings the openings to Blood +.) I wrote down the song by listening to it on the radio, so hopefully I got it right.

Hey if anyone has the lyrics to Daughtry's "HOME" I would love it if you could send them to me in a review. That is the song that I will be using for the next chap and I really don''t wanna have to write it down off the radio, that is unless I find that perfect song for Spike's waking up scene.

--

_**"In My Arms"**_

Faye was nervous as she approached the sterile, white building. But she was excited as well she realized upon seeing the drawing of a mother cradling her baby beside the sign of the building, for today she would get to see her two babies.

It had been three months since she found out she was pregnant. It took her a week to get used to the idea of actually being pregnant and with twins, and another one to being a single mother of two. But then she realized that at least she did not have to do it all alone. Jet was going to be an amazing "grandpa"- he had started "baby proofing" two days after finding Faye on the bathroom floor. Ed had come back with Ein trotting at her heels two weeks later, and was taking her role as Auntie Edward very seriously, ordering baby and mothering books for Faye to read, being cheerful about the pregnancy thereby keeping Faye from becoming down, hacking into stores so they got everything the babies could possibly need, and researching any technology advances that had to due with babies.

Which explained why she was entering this posh doctor's office. While Ed was doing "baby research", she came upon a new ultrasound (though it did not use sound waves at all) that allowed you to see exactly how the baby looked in technicolor by using a mini-camera through the belly button. Ed was so excited about this info, she convinced Jet to take the Bebop to the only planet that had the only hospital that used this new machine, and convinced Faye to make the appointment so that "they could all have pictures of the babies growing inside Faye's stomach".

Though, Faye had to admit that Ed's enthusiasm was infectious, she herself could not wait to see what the babies looked like. She wondered whether they both would look like her, just like Spike, or maybe a mixture of both. She thought of how she would manage their hair if they ended up with Spike's fuzzy green rat's nest, even though she secretly wished one would.

Faye smoothed out her new pretty white above the knee sun dress. She took a breath then walked into the building, gave her name to the receptionist, and took a seat to wait and fill out all the necessary paperwork. Faye looked around the waiting room which she had to admit created quite a comforting atmosphere with the plush ivory chairs, demure rose colored wallpaper, soft off-white carpet, and an assortment of high-end mother and child paintings on the walls. There were also several other women in varying stages of pregnancy, some filling out their own paperwork and some flipping through magazines, and a couple others holding babies no more than a month or so old.

Because the waiting room was almost full, Faye had to sit between a woman who looked like she could go into labor any minute and another woman, who looked to be at least fifteen years older than Faye, that was holding one of the aforementioned babies. They both gave Faye a smile as she sat down. As Faye started on the forms, she couldn't help glancing at each of the women. But her eyes would always find themselves upon the baby the older woman held in her arms.

The woman noticed and asked with a smile, "Is this your first, hon?"

"Wha-"

The woman smiled that same smile, "Is this your first baby?"

"Oh yeah it is. How did you know?" Faye asked.

"One as experienced as I am can always tell who's a newbie. The biggest tell is how they look at someone else's baby. Those who already have one will usually just smile, maybe coo over another baby to be polite. New mothers look at a newborn with awe, wonder, a bit of hesitation, nervousness, and perhaps a bit of fear as well. All of which were on your face when you looked upon my little Zach here."

Faye blushed slightly, "Oh sorry about that."

At that the woman laughed and waved Faye's apology away. "Think nothing of it. Like I said it's natural for a newbie because you look at him and it really hits that there is a real, live, albeit tiny human being growing inside you that you will be completely responsible for the next eighteen years. But you will be a mother for the rest of your life, just at adulthood you are there for support and love."

Faye sat there absorbing all that the woman had said.

"Would you like to hold him?"

Faye looked at her in astonishment, "Wha-.. I-I couldn't poss.. I..I never.. I don't kn.."

The woman just smiled. "Nonsense. Now just put your arms just like mine are."

Faye complied.

The woman laid little Zach in the nervous arms of Faye. "Here. Just support his head, he's only three weeks old and babies have to have their heads supported when they are being held until they can hold their own head up, usually by six weeks. There you go. See you are a natural."

Faye could not respond. All she could do was look down in wonderment at the blue-wrapped bundle in her arms. She took in all of his features: bond curls, straight nose, pursed lips, dimples. long, long eyelashes (that she was instantly jealous of), and glazed soft completely blue eyes?

Confusion must have been apparent in her expression, because before she could even as the woman explained, "Most babies are born with a blue coating over their eyes which is typically gone before they are six weeks old."

Well that explains it, thought Faye as she continued gazing down at the infant. Then the baby did something that shocked Faye. He smiled at her and cooed.

_Your baby blues_

_So full of wonder_

_Your curly ques_

_Your contagious smile_

"See I told you you were a natural. He instantly likes you, and you didn't have to coo first, baby talk him, or play peek-a-boo."

"I guess, or it just confirms that men of all ages like me," Faye said half-jokingly.

"Maybe my son is already at the age to notice girls, though it seems like just yesterday I was pregnant. And while I don't doubt that, I still believe you are a natural."

_And as I watch _

_You start to grow up_

_And all I can do_

_Is hold you tight_

"Well, one can hope. Though I think you are the one that is a natural," Faye said seriously.

"Pish. Only because I have three others at home. And believe me, I was no natural. With my first I asked my mom to move in for two months since calling her every ten minutes with a baby crying in my ear was not feasible."

The woman and Faye both laughed.

"I can laugh about it now, but at the time I was an emotional wreck. I am glad my mom was around to support me. I could have gotten through it by myself, but I think, especially the first time, a woman needs someone to support her through it all. I did have my husband there as well, but he was as green at everything as me. Are you going to have your mother help you?"

"She died a long time ago," responded Faye.

"Oh sorry. Well, what about the father, is he there for you?"

"H-he died over three months a-ago," Faye choked out, tears welling in her eyes.

"Oh, I am so sorry. Did he know?"

Faye shook her head, blinking furiously so as not to cry.

_Knowing clouds will rage and_

_Storms will race in _

_But you will be safe _

_In my arms_

_Rains will pour down_

_Waves will crash around_

_But you will be safe_

_In my arms_

"I found out a couple of days later," said Faye once more in control of her emotions.

"Well, do you have anyone to help you out?"

"Actually, I do. I have someone who is a father-type figure for both of us, and someone who has already dubbed herself Auntie Edward."

"That's good. At least you have some special people in your life because there are so many who don't. Did your "father" take the news he was going to be a grandpa well?"

"Oh, yes. He has been baby-proofing everything ever since he found out."

The woman just smiled obviously amused.

"It really isn't that surprising. He's always taking in strays like me, Sp-Spike, Ed, so what's two more," Faye joked.

"Sounds like a knight-in-shining-armor savior type."

"Nahh..that was actually more of Spike's role. Always saving the damsel-in-distress which just happened to be me most of the time. He always had to come get me out of whatever scrap I would land myself in. Jet would probably be more of the wizened, kindly king who was exasperated about 99 of the time by the antics of his kids."

_Storybooks _

_Full of fairy tales_

_Of kings and queens_

_And the bluest skies_

"So this Spike is the baby's father?"

"How did you guess?"

"By the way you spoke of him for one, and how difficult it was for you to even mention his name."

"Oh. Didn't know I was so obvious."

_My heart is torn _

_Just in knowing_

_You'll one day see_

_The truth from lies_

At that moment little Zach started to fuss, so Faye carefully handed him back to his mother. She deftly put him to breast, and Faye could not help but think that at least she should not have a problem keeping her babies fed.

"Well on to a different topic. Do you know what you are having?"

"Yeah. Twins, a boy and a girl."

"Wow. On your first pregnancy too. How far along are you?"

"Bout four months."

"Well dear at least you are not showing too much yet. Although you will soon and pretty quickly I imagine. I always shot out in my fourth and fifth month. Good thing you still have the maternal glow of pregnancy. With Zach here I was so sick the first five months that by the time I could glow I was too big and suffering from swollen ankles and back pain."

"So you are saying that right now I glow, but I'll probably lose that soon because in a month I'll be as big as a house?"

The woman laughed, "Maybe or maybe you'll get lucky and still feel and look beautiful. Some women are lucky. I wasn't, but I didn't start off as good as you are, either."

"I'm sure you were still glowy beautiful too."

"Maybe. My husband never did complain."

Faye just began laughing as did the woman.

_Knowing clouds will rage and_

_Storms will race in _

_But you will be safe_

_In my arms_

_Rains will pour down_

_Waves will crash around_

_But you will be safe _

_In my arms_

"Faye Valentine. The doctor will see you now," piped the receptionist.

Faye turned to the woman. "Thank you for all the advice. I really appreciate it."

The woman fumbled through her purse finally retrieving a pen and what looked to be a receipt. "No problem Faye. Here's my phone number. Call me if you ever need anything, if you have any questions, or if you just need to chat. My name is Elena."

"Thank you so much." Faye brushed a knuckle across the baby's cheek, "Bye little Zach."

Then Faye followed the nurse through the door. She was led to a private exam room where they told her to hop onto the bed and lay down. She complied. The nurse put a blanket over Faye's legs. Then the doctor came in.

"Hello Ms. Valentine, I'm Doctor Smith. I see here we are to get pictures of the babies and make sure everything is going smoothly."

Faye just nodded at the older man.

"Good. Now I see this is your first pregnancy and your first ultrasound, so I will talk you through this as we do it. Okay just lift your dress up past your belly."

Faye complied.

"I will now apply this numbing cream so you won't experience any discomfort. Good. Now for the insertion of the nano-camera."

Faye watched as the doctor took a needle and put it in her belly button and pushed the plunger.

"Now we wait for one minute and then images of your babies will show on this screen. Then we can put images in these digital frames for you to take."

Faye watched the screen with growing anticipation. Things started to clear and that's when she got her first glimpse of the babies she and Spike had created together.

"Good everything appears normal. One boy. One girl. Size is good. Heart rates are fine. Movement is good as well. Wow look at all that hair! Must take after the father I presume."

The doctor rambled on as Faye tuned him out completely transfixed on the images on the screen. Those were her babies and they were perfect. Everything was fine. They were so beautiful. Tears started running down Faye's cheeks. She had something of Spike to love forever, well two technically. Two parts to keep and remember.

_Castles they might crumble_

_Dreams may not come true_

_But you are never all alone_

_Cause I will always _

_Always love you_

_Hey I _

_Hey I_

The doctor printed out some of the images and handed them to Faye along with a tissue. "Well here you go and here's the disc. Now the nano will stay taking video until birth, so I won't have to do this every month. Here's a prescription for vitamins you need to take, and make sure you make another appointment with the receptionist for next month. You're done and I will see you next month Ms. Valentine."

With that he left Faye, to straighten and compose herself. She shoved the disc and prescription in her purse. She used the tissue to erase the evidence of her tears, while staring at the pictures of her babies. She took her fingertip and gently stroked one baby's profile then did the same to the other.

She took a deep shuddering breath. "I promise you two right now that I will keep both of you safe. You will never know what it's like to be alone, or how it is to have to fight for survival." She moved her hand to her bump gently caressing, "You will always know love, even if it is just from me. I will tell you of your father, so you can know him too. Even though you will never meet him, you will have me and we are a family. And we do have Jet, Ed, and Ein."

_Knowing clouds will rage and _

_Storms will race in_

_But you will be safe _

_In my arms_

_Rains will pour down_

_Waves will crash around_

_But you will be safe _

_In my arms_

Faye walked out of the exam room, head high. She made another appointment with the receptionist. She noticed Elena was gone. She walked out of the building heading towards her only home, the Bebop. She couldn't wait to show Jet and Ed the pictures and disc of the babies.

At least I got my wish, and with that Faye smiled. People stopped and stared at the happy, beautifully glowing woman walking down the street.

_My arms_

_See ya space cowgirl..._

_--ooooooooooooooohhh evil no description of babies til later..finally complete feb 23. and it's really long for me_

Okay How was that? Read and REVIEW Please!! Thanks to **brainfear, sparkle85, animebdoll, lilgirlinthe rain, and Rikku Apple **for reviewing the last chap. Thanks to **Thunder Shock Blade **for adding me to your favs, and **Faye317, Foxlix, Ranmawho1, Bittenxcore, and kimchan884 **for adding me to their alerts.

Oh and here is the rest of my rant from the top when I started this last week.

Oh well!! And I also got fired from Dillard's for being tardy(oops) I mean my last one was on July 24, so I have been looking for a job. Mostly online because I despise having to go into a store and getting an application, filling it out, then having to go back in. I also hate the interview process even though I made it to state in FBLA in that category, but back then I was so much better at lying and telling the interviewer what they wanted to hear and now I feel guilty and awkward doing that- not that I have that much to hide, though I am not telling them I was tardy the last job. That is just a really bad habit that probably won't go away until I am doing a job somewhere that I love. For that I either have to go back to college, or take off to Japan and/or start the Christian singing thing that I feel is what I really am meant for.

Anyway waayyyyyyyy off topic there! Did anyone else watch the showing of this show again on cartoon network. I know dubbed is evil, but this one is not as bad as some. Anyway, I caught a lot more in those last couple eps than I ever have, probably because I wasn't bawling my eyes out this time. I mean the first time you saw the previews so you had to know it was coming and then the whole moment between him and Faye just set me off. But I guess after a couple of years and knowing what is going to happen one becomes less emotional( though I still teared up).

Alrighty then, everyone pray and hope I get a job hopefully at a bank! I mean I am so broke and have so many bills and I have to let things go for now so that means late fees and blah blah blah! At least my mom will lend me money for gas and food! Moms are the greatest. Did anyone else go shopping on Black Friday! I did though only spending my mom's money. Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving- barring that-days off from work and school! _And Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, and Happy Valentines- cuz even if you are single the candy is great:P._


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey Everybody! **I'm back again and as soon as my car's fixed enough, I will be able to get a job and get my internet back so I can post this. Anyway, I know last chap was mostly filler, but I had already started it when I found the perfect song for Spike's awakening which I had alluded to back at the end of chap 3. I liked last chap anyway and since I wrote it first it will be posted first. I am starting this on March 20, so we will see when I post it.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Cowboy Bebop. The song is _Time of Dying _from Three Days Grace-love them and want to see them in concert. I stole it from someone else's fic who used many of their songs, so I copied them (the songs) because I knew I could use them and knew this would be perfect for Spike's Awakening. I do remember that I did not really care for the stories because it's not in my favs and I can't even remember anything about them.

--

**Time of Dying**

(Spike's pov on this one, song seemed too personal and too perfect for third person pov)

I stagger away from Viscious's dead body. The bastard deserved to die. He ruined my life, hunted me down, made sure Julia stayed away, killed Shin and the others, and tried to kill me a few times. At least now with his death the past is finally over. And with my death it will remain that way.

I stagger out of the room. I am filled with pain, and my vision is blurry. It won't be long now. I hear shots of the other syndicate members, but cant make out any words. It doen'st matter anyhow.

I reach the stairs. I see shapes through my blurred vision. I raise my hand and make a gun, "Bang."

I fall down. I can no longer move. My body becomes numb with blood loss. As I feel the coldness creeping over me, my memories flash across my mind. I see Mao, Rose, Shin, Viscious, Julia, the Bebop, Jet, Ed, Ein, and Faye.

_On the ground I lay  
Motionless in pain  
I can see my life flashing before my eyes  
Dead I fall asleep  
Is this all a dream  
Wake me up, I'm living a nightmare_

Faye. In my mind's eye, all I see is her: from the casino uniform to the black dress to the yellow outfit and from a coy smile to laughter to anger to her tears. The one regret I will have is not letting anything happen between us after the night we slept together. Oh well, regrets are useless now. I guess that's why they're called regrets.

_I will not die (I will not die)  
I will survive_

_I will not die, I'll wait here for you  
I feel alive, when you're beside me  
I will not die, I'll wait here for you  
In my time of dying_

I let out a shuddering breath, and darkness closes over me as I hear vague shouts of disembodied voices surround me.

--

_**Beep. Beep. Beep.**_

The fog in my mind starts to lift. What is that incessant beeping? Where am I? I smell the strong scent of disinfectant and antiseptic. It is cold, and the bed I appear to be laying on is firm. There were stiff covers on top of me.

I was in a hospital. I guess I didn't die, though I could not understand how exactly that was possible. Last time Faye had saved me, but there was no way she could have taken down the rest of the syndicate to do so this time.

So how come I am still alive and not in heaven or hell?

_On this bed I lay  
Losing everything  
I can see my life passing me by  
Was it all too much  
Or just not enough  
Wake me up, I'm living a nightmare_

I open my eyes a slit. Everything is blurry and all I can see are dark shapes against bright hazy light. I hear people shout, and suddenly I am bombarded with people, doctors and nurses, I suppose, asking questions and poking and prodding me.

I groan and open my eyes fully.

"Hi, I am Dr. Thomas. Do you know who you are? Do you remember what happened?"

I try to answer, but only a rasp came out. I settle for nodding.

"Your voice will come back eventually. You haven't used it for a month, and until a week ago you had a tube down your throat making you breathe. Would you like some water?"

I nod and a nurse holds a cup of water to my lips. I drink my fill.

"You are really lucky. I have never known anyone else to survive even half the amount of damage your body took. Though I could tell it wasn't the first time you have knocked on death's door. You have some big scars that have a lot of scar tissue surrounding them. So, do you remember what exactly happened to put you here in the first place?"

_I will not die (I will not die)  
I will survive_

_I will not die, I'll wait here for you  
I feel alive, when you're beside me  
I will not die, I'll wait here for you  
In my time of dying_

I was able to croak out a,"Yes."

The doctor looked at me expectantly. He obviously wanted mor information.

At that moment, five men in dark suits walked in.

"You can go now doctor," the tallest one said.

The doctor looked at them and new that it was best to do as he was told. He left ushering the nurses out as well.

I looked at the men in my room. Members of the syndicate. Top members. Well, at least I know who saved me though there was still the question of why.

"Hello Mr. Spiegel. I am Maoru Yamaguchi. I bet you are surprised as to why you are still alive, yes?"

I nod.

"Well it is simple. You killed our boss. He never named a successor, so the will of our previous boss is still in effect. As you know, he named both you and Viscious as successors."

I stared at him in shock. Surely, he couldn't mean...

"Yes, you are now overlord of the syndicate."

"But I defected years ago, and I killed your most recent boss."

"True, but oftentimes that is how a new boss comes around anyway, by an inside mutiny. However, you managed to take us down all by yourself. This feat has earned you the respect, awe, and fear of not only our syndicate, but of the others as well."

"And if I refuse?"

"Now why would you do that? This gives you the chance to start anew. You can reshape the syndicate. You will have all the power and money that you could ever desire. You will be able to do anything you wish, even ridding old friends of debt and bounties. I believe you know a Faye Valentine, right? And of couse the trouble of Jet Black and his ship could also disappear, shoud you decide to make them."

I said nothing.

"After all, you really are the only one that could take on the job and succeed. I mean you were groomed for the job, and since you tore it apart, I am sure you can repair it."

_I will not die, I'll wait here for you  
I feel alive, when you're beside me  
I will not die, I'll wait here for you  
In my time of dying_

I sat there thinking it over. If I took the position, I could pay back my friends for all the trouble I caused them. I knew I could do the job, and handle the members accordingly. Maybe I could also right some of Viscious's wrongs.

I looked at Maoru, "Fine. I will do it."

He smiled, "I knew you would see it my way. Now Boss Spiegel is there anything you wish for me to do."

I nodded, "Yes. Fist I want to get out of here. Second take care of any and all bounties and debt attached to Faye Valentine, Jet Black, and the Bebop. Third I need some clothes and a shower."

"Consider it done. We also have an apartment set up for you. It is actually the top floor of headquarters. Do you wish for us to notify your friends that you are well?"

"Do they believe me to be dead?"

"Yes, I beleive so."

I shook my head, "No, not right now."

"Whatever you want Boss. We will be back with the clothes shortly." He and the others left the room.

I pondered my new life. It could work, and it would be nice to have a break and actually have money and food. Once I settle in, I will contact my old shipmates and let them know I am alive. They'll probably be a little pissed at me, but I am sure they will get over it. Then I will take care of the unfinished buisness between Faye and I.

_I will not die, I'll wait here for you  
I feel alive, when you're beside me  
I will not die, I'll wait here for you  
In my time of dying_

See ya Space Cowboy!

--

Thank you for reading please review and let me know what ya think, and yeah I admit I am long winded. ;) Happy Easter! Hey check out my BBRae ficlet. I swear it's good, though sappy in some parts, but mostly funny. I know there are many ways one can be the successor to a mob-yakuza if you will- but it usually involves blood in some way.


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey Everybody, old and new!** When I can actually post this this will be the third chap. Yea me! This fic is starting to wind down. After this only about two more chappies-I just have to find the right songs, and think about how exactly I will end it. Anyway, I am starting this on April 8, so hopefully I will be able to post it soon-no promises as I still don't have the internet and my town's library won't allow you to use disks on their computers. Poo on them. I finished chap 5 only last night, so I am on a roll.

**Disclaimer:** Sadly I still do not own Cowboy Bebop. The song is "Home" and belongs to Daughtry- hopefully the lyrics are right copied from listening when I could catch it on the radio and t.v.

Oh and anyone, which I assume you do, that reads the fanfiction of Cowboy Bebop regularly- can you believe that she is still writing "Leadbelly: She wanted to die"? I mean, I started reading that when she started it, which was over six years ago. Bad thing is since she updates every couple of months and it has been going on so long, I have no idea what happened before the last few chaps. I can't even remember how it started- just that I liked it. Anyway props to you for going so long!

--

( 3 months after last chap took place- coincides with Faye's appt.)

**"Home"**

A man stands in the shadows beside a tall window, staring out the window as the sun is setting. He was wearing an expertly tailored black two-piece suit with an open-collared rich navy blue silk shirt. He was tall with a lean, lanky frame, but an aura of power, physical and mental, surrounded him. He also had green poofy hair and mismatched eyes.

This man was Spike Spiegel. He lifted a cigarette to his lips and continued staring out the window. One could sense that his mind was not focused on anything outside the window, but his face betrayed no emotion except for deep thought.

_Staring out into the night_

_Trying to hide the pain_

_Going to the place where love_

_And feeling good don't ever cost a thing_

_And feeling good's a different kind of pain_

Maoru Yamaguchi could easily sense that his boss's mind was elsewhere, and that Spike was not listening to a word he was saying. He could also easily guess just what his boss was thinking. 'A man only gets that recessed into his mind when he is thinking about a woman- a woman he feels he should not be thinking about,' he thought. 'Well, then I think I do indeed need to impart the information I came across.'

"The Yammata Clan has agreed to the meet."

"Hmm."

"Everything is set for the meet since all have confirmed. Intel has been gathering specifics about each clan and anything that may be used to convince each clan to conform to your wishes."

"Hmm."

"Intel has also discovered the presence of an old ship renowned for hunting bounties currently docked at your harbor. Apparently, the ship is named the Bebop."

"Hmm."

Maoru Yamaguchi waited for what he said to sink in.

Spike whipped around, "What?! What did you say?"

Maoru smirked, "I said that the Bebop is currently docked in your harbor."

"Since when?"

"Last night."

"Why? Is it looking for a bounty?"

"No, apparently not."

"Did intel happen to know why they are here? Have they found out about me?"

"No. We believe they still do not know you are even alive."

Spike sighed with relief- really if his former friends and comrades were to find out about him still being alive he would feel guilty that they found out from an outside source and not from himself.

Maoru continued, "Apparently Jet Black took the former hacker Ed along with him to shop for supplies."

Spike nodded, "Anything else?"

Now Maoru was not a stupid man, he understood the unasked question, "A Faye Valentine had an appointment with a doctor this afternoon."

At that Spike stepped forward and grabbed Maoru by his lapels, "What? Why was she at a doctor?"

Not liking the anger emanating from his boss, Maoru hurriedly said, "It was a female doctor. She is perfectly fine."

Spike released him, "Good. Is that all?"

Maoru nodded.

Spike turned back to the window. "You may leave."

When he reached the door he turned around, "Boss?"

"Hmm?"

"At the risk of being impertinent, I think it may be time you took a long walk. Down by the docks, perhaps?"

"Hmm."

_I'm going home_

_To the place where I belong_

_Where your love has always been enough for me_

"Ya know boss, you have done a good thing here for the past three months. We now rule predominately through respect with a little fear rather than through complete terror and cruelty. Most of us can actually sleep at night as well."

"Hmm."

"You also have the power to offer membership to others. Perhaps even old friends?"

Spike tuned his head and eyed his second-in-command.

"Pardon me for mentioning this, but you have seemed rather despondent lately. Maybe you miss the excitement of your old life? Your old friends? If you chose to ressurrect yourself, conference calls and attendence only at necessary meetings are perfectly viable options in order to remain boss."

"Really now?"

Maoru nodded.

Spike turned back to the window, 'Maoru has a point. I have been missing that life. _Especially_ her. Maoru also has a plan and it is one that will allow that option.'

Spike turned away from the window and walked through the door, saying to Maoru, "I think I will take that walk now."

_I'm not running from_

_Don't think you've got me all wrong_

_I don't regret this life just for me_

_But these place and these faces are getting old_

_So I'm going home_

"When can we expect you back?"

Spike shrugged, "Depends on the weather."

Maoru nodded, "Hopefully the weather stays nice."

Spike chuckled, "Knowing the weather, I can expect some storms. But I am used to that, so that won't be a deterrment."

_Miles are getting longer it seems_

_The closer I get to you_

_I've not always been a good enough man for you_

_But you love me too_

_And I don't know why_

_You always seem to give me another try_

"Well, good luck then boss."

"Thanks. See ya." With that Spike left the room, rode the elevator down to the ground floor, and left the skyscraper he had been living in since he woke up in the hospital.

_I'm going home_

_To the place where I belong_

_Where your love has always been enough for me_

_I'm not running from_

_Don't think you've got me all wrong_

_I don't regret this life just for me_

_But these place and these faces are getting old_

_So I'm going home_

As he strode down the street, he couldn't help but wonder what his reception would be like. Would they be happy, mad, sad, shocked?

He knew Ed would be happy and probably not at all shocked.

He figured Jet would be shocked at first, maybe even a little mad that he hadn't contacted them at once when he woke up. Then he figured Jet would be genuinely happy that his best friend was still alive.

_Be careful what you wish for_

_'Cuz you just might get it all_

_And then some you don't want_

Spike wasn't sure about Faye. He knew he had broken her heart when he walked out on her. He knew that at first she would be shocked and in complete disbelief, but then she would more than likely become a little hell-cat. He figured he needed to be prepared for tears, insults, and, more than likely, bodily harm. Oh well, whatever she would throw at him, he knew he deserved.

_I'm going home_

_To the place where I belong_

_Where your love has always been enough for me_

At least he would be entertained. There was never a dull moment around that woman. And he would see her once again.

Spike sighed as he reached the docks. Almost immediately he sighted the Bebop. At the sight of that ship he felt a peace come over him.

He took a deep breath.

_I'm not running from_

_Don't think you've got me all wrong_

_I don't regret this life just for me_

_But these place and these faces are getting old_

_So I'm going home_

He reached the Bebop's door.

He knocked and released the breath he was holding.

_These places and these facea are getting old_

_So I'm going home_

This place, and the people inside were home. His only home.

The door opened.

"Yo."

_So I'm going home_

See ya Space Cowboy!

--

Thank you for reading! Please review! Finished on April 23-kinda took a break for a while. Oh the weather that Spike and Maoru were talking about was Faye. As I said before Maoru isn't stupid. I will work on more, but once I find a job who knows when I will be in the mood to write. Luv ya!!


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